Tag Archives: NLT

Miraculous New Creations

5 Oct

Last post I shared a link to the story about how God “miraculously healed” my camera. This past Saturday I witnessed how God continues to heal minds and spirits. I had the privilege of speaking to group of over 90 amazing young women at the West Texas A&M University Wesley Foundation retreat. The retreat theme was You Are God’s Masterpiece.

So many young women and men feel inadequate—never quite able to measure up to the expectations of their parents, teachers, coaches, or peers. Many experience physical, sexual, or emotional abuse. Anxiety, depression, cutting, and eating disorders often result from such experiences.

God’s word has good news. We don’t have to accept the world’s performance based expectations and evaluations.

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God” (Romans 12:2 NKJV).

We renew our minds by changing the Source of our value. Consider the first Bible verse. “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.” After each day’s creation, “God saw that it was good.” The earth’s grandeur set a tremendous standard of beauty and functionality. But God topped that when He said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over [the earth and its creatures]” (Genesis 1:26 NASB95). After God created man and woman, He “saw all that He had made, and behold, it was very good” (Genesis 1:31a NASB95). Six goods and one “very good!” God regards people as His best work, His masterpiece.

“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago” (Ephesians 2:10 NLT).

Sometimes trauma keeps us from seeing ourselves as God’s masterpiece, but there are many other ways we receive the message we’re inadequate. It can be a series of circumstances across the years. I remember the skinny 4th grade girl who asked my chubby self, “Why do you always wear the same dress?” I didn’t tell her about riding the bus downtown with a friend and choosing the fabric and pattern. I felt so “mature” as I shopped and so beautiful when Mom finished it. With one sentence and a roll of her eyes, I allowed her to make me feel poor and unattractive.

Everyone wants to feel accepted and valued which sometimes leads to destructive choices and the inability to stand up for our beliefs and our personal value. No matter what our past, no matter the false narratives we’ve believed about ourselves, God provides a fresh start. We can be pure and beautiful, strong and powerful, and greatly loved when we trust Jesus Christ to change us.

“This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!” (2 Corinthians 5:17 NLT).

Would you encourage others by sharing how you’ve made a new start? We’d love to hear from you.

The I’s Have It

7 Sep

Most conflict isn’t of the relationship-ending sort. It’s more often about who cooks and who washes the dishes. However, even small-unresolved conflict causes stress and wears on relationships.

I once taught peer mediation to 4th-8th graders. Even kindergarteners were able to settle disputes with the help of a mediator. I realized anyone could learn simple mediation skills. These skills pertain to parent/child, siblings, roommates, business associates, spouses, and more.

That was huge for me. As a people pleaser, I hated conflict. My heart and prayer is that we become problem solvers even without a mediator. Here are some tips.

An “I Message” can be a handy communication tool during conflict. It allows us to acknowledge our responsibility, emotions, and needs without blaming. It contains three simple parts.

I feel ______, because (when you) ______. I want (need you to) ______.

The goal isn’t to spew out pent up frustration. Instead, let’s problem solve. Give yourself time to think. “The heart of the righteous weighs its answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil” (Proverbs 15:28 NIV). The prodigal son rehearsed exactly what he would say to his father (Luke 15). Let’s plan and practice.

Suppose roommates (Cici and Didi) disagree over cleaning. If Cici says, “You make me furious because you won’t carry your load,” she’s inviting defensiveness. Instead, Cici might say, “It seems unfair that I work fulltime and still have to do most of the cleaning. I want to divide the chores evenly.” Notice Cici covered the three parts of an I Message, but didn’t use the exact words.

Proverbs 12:15 Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others (NLT).

Didi, in a perfect world and after practice, resists the urge to explain and summarizes, “You feel I’m not doing my fair share of chores and you want to divide them differently.” Notice it’s a paraphrase as she absorbs Cici’s meaning. (See last week’s post.) Since Didi got it, it’s her turn. “Sure, I only work part time, but I’ve got school and studying. If I do more chores, my grades will drop.”

After both feel understood, it’s time to brainstorm for solutions. Write down each proposed solution without judgment. Cici might say, “You can pay me $15 an hour to do your part of the cleaning.” Incorrectly done, Didi might say, “Are you crazy? Where do you think I’m going to come up with $15 an hour?” More helpful—she’d offer another solution. “We can divide chores according to my class schedule.”

Cross off all ideas except solutions both consider workable. Discuss possible implications and consequences for each. Select the best alternative and agree on a timed trial. Each person writes how she’ll keep her part of the agreement. It might look like this.

“We agree to meet Sunday afternoon and make a list of chores and times we’ll do them. Cici promises not to nag, remind, or complain about chores. Didi promises to complete her jobs on time. We will meet again in one week to determine our success.”

(Signed) Cici             Didi

In a week, chores or times may need tweaking. If that solution doesn’t work, choose another and try again.

“Finally, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, affectionate, compassionate, and humble. Do not return evil for evil or insult for insult, but instead bless others because you were called to inherit a blessing” (1 Peter 3:8–9 NET).